Thoughts From Max

So, I said that I was going to sit down and write a semi-serrious blog post this week, and here we are. As I sit here I’m listening to music, as is the case most of my life, and the resounding theme in all of these songs is just depressing. You know what I’m talking about? All of these everything is crap, my life sucks, just that down in that dump feeling. I don’t get it. I mean sure, I have my moments where I just want to give up, but why do we focus on them? Why do we find the need to just sit and wallow in all the stink of life? And then, as if that isn’t bad enough, we all find someone or something to blame it all on. How is that right? I mean, can’t we all just step up to the plate and take a little bit of responisbility for what is going on in our lives? All I see as I look around is people trying to place blame; blame on the economy, blame on family, blame on government, blame on joe-bag-o-dounuts. What ever happened to living your life and having to face the consequences of what’s gone wrong in it?

I guess the best example for me to look at would have the be the book of Job in the bible. Now, this guy had it all. The money. The riches. The cool toys. And he truly believed in god. He knew that God gave it all to him. Now, Satan saw this, and he wanted to put this guy to the test. So he went and asked God to let him, and god did. And guess what…. Satan took away all those toys and riches and money. The guys reaction. God gave it to me. God can take it away from me. He knows what’s best. When did we go away from that sort of mentality. God does know what’s best for us. Know. The big thing that we have to realize is that god may know what’s best for us, but it may not match what we think is best for us. Kinda funny how that works out. We always pray and try to get all the things that we think we need, but we don’t really think about how God might KNOW that we need something different. Just think about that. Think about how God could be trying to teach you something, but you just sit there and complain about how bad your life is.
So that’s my serrious post for the day. I hope you enjoyed reading it. Think about it. Enjoy it.

So, I guess I’ll give you a little bit of an update on what’s been going on, I haven’t written in a while, my bad, I don’t know what I haven’t, I’ve had all the time in the world. My weekend was nice, it started of on Friday night, youth group was at the Kelly’s house and we had a fire and games and pizza and all that fun stuff. We played an intense game of soccer… I may or may not have used my body as a way to keep people from getting the ball. There was also a person there that used to be in CAP before she went off to college, turned out we knew a lot of the same people, it was really cool getting to talk to her. Saturday wasn’t really anything all that special durring the day, I didn’t have to work, the season at Gunstock is basically over, Tye and I got the rookies of the year award, that was pretty cool, not gunna lie. So instead of working, I basically chilled at home durring the day. And then at night I went down to a theology discussion, that was really nice, good talk, hopefully the next one will be awesome too. Today was a slow relaxed day, I guess. We woke up, went to church, home, chilled, end of the year party at work, dinner, home. And that’s been my weekend in a nutshell, I guess I prolly left out some of the details, but that’s okay. You don’t need to know them all… after all if you did, that would be kinda stalkerish.

I didn’t get to go down to New York this week, I don’t know if I told you about that. that was really dissapointing, not going to lie, but that’s okay. I guess it all works out for the best in the end. Shooting is done as well, that’s going to be missed, I can’t wait to get my averages for the season though, I want to know how much I inproved over last year, that’s the goal, I know for a fact I didn’t go backwards. If I did go backwards, there would be something really wrong. I shot in the 240’s consistently almost all season.

I don’t really know what I’m going to be up to this week. I know that I’ve got youth worship practice tomorrow night, I’m hoping that goes well, we’re doing five songs, they are kinda easy ones, but still, it’s always nice when things just flow, you know? Oh, and I’m meeting with Jason again, that will be cool. I like talking to him, he’s a nice guy. I went down to guitar center on Saturday, I forgot to mention that, I saw this really nice acoustic guitar that I liked… it was almost a thousand dollars though, I don’t really know if I want to pay that much right now. My parents are going to want me to pay for part of my CAP camps this summer, and I don’t want to get my bank account really low. But it was so nice, a Taylor… just… I don’t know, it sounded really awesome. I’m really into acoustic music, it’s so much fun to just sit down and see what you can do with the guitar, what the guitar can do with you.

So what would it take for me to post on a semi regular basis this week, I don’t really don’t know, but I’m going to try to. And I’m even going to try and sit down and write one serrious post each week. I really am going to try. I haven’t written anything serrious in the longest time. And for that I do truly appologize to you. I don’t know if I haven’t had anything serrious to say of if I just haven’t wanted to write it out. But I’m going to try and change that. I’m going to go now. I don’t really have anything else to say. For tonight. This week there will be a time when I will write something else more substantial for you. Goodnight.

Oh, my. What a day, it just seemed to start and never stop. But, now that it’s night, and I get to sit down and think about it, it was all in all a really nice day. I have to say, I really didn’t think that it was going to just go like it did. I really didn’t sleep again last night, to be honest, I’m getting so sick of this not sleeping thing. But, that’s okay, you know? Really, today just seems like a blur, but I’ll go back and tell you about it. I woke up, and took a shower and did my school. I wrote a paper today and worked on more SAT stuff. I really enjoy writing things, but I can’t say as much about practicing for the SAT. After I got that all done, I tried writing some music, I’ve got the chord progression down that I want. Now it’s all a matter of getting it to sound how I want it to sound. So I guess the chords could change. Then after that it was lunch, and then a little break for a while. I then proceded to go to the Library with my mom, and then down to Concord with her. While we were in Concord we first went to Target and I got a new shirt, which is really nice. And then I dropped her off at Michales, some craft store, and I went to meet with Jason Rose. He’s a really awesome guy, I enjoy being able to hang out and talk with him. After meeting with him, I picked my mom up and headed home. Then it was basically a race to eat dinner and get out to shooting on time. I actually did fairly decent tonight. I shot a 246 and a 250. Really good scors for me. To bad it was the last night of the season. Then I came home, and now we’re up to this point of time.

I really have to say that I was listening to some good music on the way home. I happened to pop in an old Switchfoot CD. I really like their lyrics, they seem to be able to cut to the heart of most things in life. One in particular talks about how love is a movement. There’s another song out there, I think it’s buy DC Talk, and it says that love is a verb. I think that’s so true. We really need to try and be love. I don’t know why I decided to throw that out there for you to see. But I did. So there.

I don’t really know what I’ve got going on this week besides hedding down to NYC or NJ, or what ever it happens to be. I’m just looking foreward to spending a night with a friend. I really wish that I was able to do that more, it seems like the people that I really do call my friends live forever away, or they are just always bussy. But I guess that just brings us closer in the long run of things. It’s funny how when you don’t get to see people, that when you do see them you get to be closer just because you don’t get to see them. I don’t know if that is making any sense at all, but I guess that’s how I’ve found it works. Maybe that’s not how it works, but it’s how it’s been working.

I’m going to go now. Time to relax and try and get some sleep. Really. I want to sleep. So, I hope that you had a good day, and I hope that you are able to have a good day tomorrow as well. Good night.

The stars are alive
They dance to the music
Of the deepest emotion
And all of the world
Is singing in time
As the heavens are caving in
Mysterious ways
Why God gave His life
To put motion inside my soul

Okay so, who doesn’t own a cell phone? Like, really, who doesn’t? I swear, every where I go people are talking on them, and texting, and doing all this crap. When did the phone become a way to get out of spending time with people? I mean, really, everyone just likes to be in their own world, it just seems kinda fake to me. I guess people don’t think that, but what ever. Fun stuff.
So I had fun today, I went to the shooting range. Good times. It’s always good to go out there and just have the power of a gun in your hand. Like, have you ever felt that. Guns are so totally awesome like that. They are just stress relievers. It really is, try it some time. You should. Other than that, I really didn’t do all that much today. I went to look at matresses. Mine sucks. And I went to church this morning. It was a good time. Nothing all that special though. Last night I went to Drop The Hammer. Good time. Always a nice time when we go down there. Earlier I had work. Ick. Kids. Equal. Pain. But that’s all good, you know? It’s a good job, and that’s all that really counts. Friday was pretty okay. I didn’t really do all that much. I went for my run. I had youth group on Friday night. That went pretty well. I was really tired. I havn’t been sleeping well, kinda blows. But youth group did go well.

I’m going to be up to some fun stuff this week. I’m headed down to NYC. I think that I really said that to you guys. But still. It’s going to be a blast of a time. I’ll get to see Emily… totaly coolness right there. Tomorrow night is going to be my last night of shooting for the season. Tuesday night, I really don’t know what I’m doing. Maybe youth group. Maybe scouts. I really don’t know. Then Friday night I’ll be going over to Kassy’s house for youth group. I think there’s going to be pizza and games and some fun stuff.

I really don’t know what to talk about. It’s just a plain ol long week. I’m sure that you’ve had one of those. I’m sure that it has something to do with the not sleeping. But I did watch a few good movies. Space Troopers. Good one with shooting and all that good stuff. And then I watched an awesome western, Apoloosa. Good story. Played alot on my guitar, actually, I guess now that I think of it, it really wasn’t all that much compared to what I usually do. But that’s okay. And then I had shooting last monday, that went actually quite well. It really kinda stinks that Moday is going to be the last night till next fall.

Well. I guess that’s it for now. Bye.

But now this broken soul of a boy falls to pieces with no choice, at the sound of your voice I fall apart…

I’m doing school at the moment, don’t you love studying for the SAT? I have this nice big blue book from the College Board… it’s called the SAT Study Guide or something like that. Don’t get me wrong, I think the SAT’s are important, but I just don’t like having to spend all the time that I am studying for them. And while I’m studying I’m listening to music, specifically a beautiful song by Switchfoot, it’s called Only Hope. Really, you need to go take a listen to it right now, it’s so amazing. It’s kind of funny how there are just some songs that speak to you, have you ever felt that? Hm. Well I think this is one of those songs for me, as funny as it might sound. But, that’s not all that important really. Another good song… In My Arms by John Foreman, he’s the lead singer guy from Switchoot and he has some awesome solo stuff out there, really beautiful acoustic music.

Well, guess what, I’m going down to New York City next Wednesday so that I can visit my friend Emily. I’m really quite excited about it. We’ll get to kick around the city or soemthing, I really don’t know what we’re going to do, I guess we need to talk about it. But that’s not the point. The point is that it’s going to be an aweosme time. She’s a totally cool girl, and yeah.

So, last night, I had CAC, right? Well, can you say waste of time? Like really, I don’t think anything really important got talked about. The only thing that might be constrewed as important would have to be some fundraising thing that the wing wants us to do. They think it would be an awesome idea for us to go out there and sell these flowers to  people. Umm. No. Like, who is going to buy flowers from a bunch of teenagers? Do you really think that’s going to work? I sure as heck don’t. But if they think it will and they can get it to work, more power to them. I understand that they are trying to get some money for cadet programs in the wing, but jeez. No cadet in their right mind wants to go out there and sell flowers to people, there have to be better ways to do that. Oh, speaking of CAP, I have that tonight… I was actually planning on going down to worship practice tonight, but I guess the leader guy is down in New York, oh well. I gues sthat’s life. I don’t really think that there is anything important going on at CAP tonight, or atleast nothing that I know about. So if there is, I guess we’ve got an issue since I’m the cadet commander.

I really don’t have any other plans for the day. School. CAP. I might go for a run. I prolly should

Well. I’ll talk to you later.

Such a nasty title for a post, no? Oh well, I really don’t care, I’m listening to that band right now, and I thought that it would be a nice way to start things off today. The specific song that I’m listening to would be “Tears Don’t Fall”, if you havn’t heard it, you should definately take a listen to it. I like it, well, I guess you have probably already realized that by now, since I’m writing about it. Anyways, I thought that I would write something for you, since I havn’t done that in a couple of days. I used to be on such a good habit of writing about every other day, I appologize for not doing that any more, I’ll try to get back into that.

Not all that much is really going on with me, well, not all that much that I think is really all that worthy of me posting about for you, but I shall give you a little glimps into my days just so that you can make that judgement on your own. The weekend was okay, I really didn’t do anything all that special. Saturday, I worked, in the morning I had a small group of kids with my brother, that was okay, nothing all that special, little pains, they were really nice, they just didn’t have any muscle control, and that is critical when you are trying to learn how to ski. After I got done with that group, I was trying to get people to fill our surveys, some skiier/snowboarder demographic survey or something like that. After work, I went up to the outlets, I was supposed to meet a friend up there, but she never showed up, it really kinda put a damper on that day. I was really looking foreward to being able to hang out with her. Sunday, I got up early and went down to Concord for church, it was nice, John always does a nice job of talking about things that people need to hear about. After that, I went back to work, trying to get people to fill our the surveys again. I guess people just don’t want to fill those stinking things out, oh well though, that’s okay. Yesterday, work, I had a group, or I was helping Pat out with a group, she’s such an awesome person, she’s an older lady, and she’s just nice, the kids really love her. Today, I don’t think that I’ll be up to all that much, school, yay for that, right? And then I’m going to go to the library and try to find some good books to read, while I’m out I’ll be going to the store to get some cookie mix stuff, and then later tonight I’m going to a cour of honor for Scouts. I guess that’s basically what I’ve been up to in a nut shell.

I’ve been so tried lately, I don’t know what the issue really is, maybe my bed is just getting old and worn out or something, but it’s really annoying to wake up and not feel rested. And sore, but I guess that’s good, means that all the working and what not that I’m doing is actually doing somethign for me. I’ve started up running again, now that this nice spring weather is here… I ran/walked three miles on Sunday, and then the same thing again yeasterday… hopefully I’ll find the time to do it again today.

I guess the ski season is finally comming to an end, the closing day for Gunstock is going to be April 5th. It’s been really good while it’s lasted. I’ve loved having the job out there. I think I’m going to end up having a job there in the summer and the fall too. That will be really nice. Doing some halloween stuff or something for them in the fall, and then in the summer the events lady needs help so hopefully I’ll get to work with her.
Well I’m going to get going for now. I need to get some stuff done today. I hope that you are doing okay…

Once more I say goodbye.

Hello amigos, how are you doing? I don’t really know any other words that are spanish that I can use in the context of this sentance, so I’m just going to leave the rest of this post in Engish, is that okay with you? I hope it is, ‘cuz I really don’t care if it’s not. Anyways, I tought it was time that I updated you on the happenings of my life. I got an e-mail the other day about my NCSA’s. I got accepted into two of the ones I wanted. YAY! I will be going down to the wonderful place called Maxwell, AFB in Alabama in the middle of July to Cadet Officer School. Hopefully I’ll come away from there with a better understanding of the Air Force and how to be a better leader. I’ll be wearing blues most of the time, it’s going to be so hot down there, but it’s going to be a blast. I can’t wait. The other camp that I will be going to is in Flint, Michigan. That one starts right at the begining of Augus and I will be learning about what it’s like to be weigtless, I’ll be doing this through SCUBA diving. It’s going to be an awesome summer, I can’t wait.

This week has actually been pretty good, I really have no complaints. Wednesday was really nice, Meghan and Sam were able to come over and we just chilled and talked for like an hour and a half. It was totally cool. I havn’t been able to hang out with Meghan since the begining of Febuary, and it was really nice to be able to connect again. Yeasterday was pretty okay, I went out to Gunstock to get my paycheck, then I had guitar lessons. I worked on a Hit the Lights song, such a good band, if you havnt’ listened to them, you really need to, like right now. After that I came home and chilled out before CAP. The night went well there, no major issues or anything so it was good. Today isn’t going to be anything all that much special. I’m going down to Concord tonight for youth group, but before that I’m going to stop by You Promote for a few minutes and talk to Neil. I still need to keep hounding them for some pictures and video so that I can get the website that I’m supposed to be working on done.

I guess I just want to give a little shout out to my friend Emily… keep on going. Don’t let all your school crap, and friends, and family get you down. Keep strong. You’ll make it. Sides, if you need to get away NH is always open to you. (:

Alright. Well I need to get some school done. So I’m going to let this be it for today. I hope that you enjoyed this nice little post. And for all of you that actually read this, thanks. Have a good day or night or afternoon.

So, I’m writing right now, because I’m not all that happy to be honest with you. I just got an e-mail telling me that the event that I’ve been planning for the better part of 4 months is going to be postponed till next spring or winter. Great. Not. I mean, really, how about people check and see if there are other things on the same day, like is that to much to ask? I guess. Oh well, I hope that it really does happen, at some point, it really was going to end up being a good time. I’m kind of blahhhh at the moment. My day really isn’t going to go anywhere. I don’t have any plans. I don’t really have anything to do. I guess that’s not so much of a big deal, but it’s really just a departure from all that I’ve had going recently. My time at Gunstock is limited, I don’t know how much longer the snow is going to stay around. It did snow a little bit yesterday, it really wasn’t all that much, only like three or four inches, and that was after it rained basically all weekend, but that’s still going to help out though. I really want to know what I’m going to be doing this summer, I still havn’t heard back from the NCSA people, I guess  I’ll find that out in the next week or so, hopefully. I know that I’ll probably get on as Encampment staff, if I don’t that’s going to really disapoint me, it’s not like I’m a cadet captain or anything like that. If all else fails I will always have the music festivals to go to.

I guess I’m just writing right now to write. My mind is all a jumble. I’m trying to do math, and it’s just failing epically. I hate calculas. Oh well. It’s something that I have to do. I guess it’s better than studying for the SAT’s but, then again, I have to do that as well. I seem to be in this cycle of doing all this school work that I don’t really like, but it’s what I have to do. I think the only subjects that I really do like would have to be History and writing. It’s just what I like. I guess we all have certain subjects that we like and certain ones that we loath. It’s just a matter of saying that we’re going to do them all and we’re going to do them to the best of our ability. And I think sometimes that’s the hard thing, being able to do what we don’t like and do it with the same type of dedication that we do the things that we really do truly love with.

So I guess that’s all that I’m going to say for today. Like I said, I don’t really have all that much to share with you. My yesterday wasn’t all that exciting to be honest with you. The most exciting thing was the worship practice for youth group that really wasn’t a practice. It was a time to learn that we wern’t going to do the songs that we said we were going to do. But that’s okay. It takes those nights sometimes to just sit back and say alright God you let us know what you want us to do. Other than that, I didn’t do all that much. Oh, I did watch a good movie. It was called An Officer and a Gentleman. Go check it out. I think you would prolly like it. Maybe not. But I did.

Good bye for now. Have a good day. And I hope that your lives aren’t supper stressed or anything like that.

Have you ever felt like someone is watching you? Like no mater where you are or what you do it feels as if someone is there? Well, I can’t say that I know what that feeling feels like, but if you do, then I’m sorry, it can’t be any fun at all. So that was a good way to start a post… at least I thought it was. I’m sure you might have a different opinion of my joke if you were the one that feels like that. Anyways, I was told today, that I need to write a new post, so that’s what I’m doing. I don’t have any real philiosophical thoughts to share with you, so I think that I will just up date you on the happenings of my life. I didn’t do anything all that exciting today, I went to church this morning. That was actually quite interesting, John, the pastor, is a really aweosme speaker. Then, we went to Sams Club and filled the car up with gas, after that we went to Wendys and got food, then we went home. I then proceded to go and help out at the schout hut, only to find out that they didn’t need any help. Oh well, I tried, right? I then went to see how my squadrons color guard practice was doing. They actually were doing halfway decent, I was proud of them. Then, that brings me to now, and right now, I’m writing this post for you, the one who asked me to write it.

Yesterday, ahh, yesterday. I worked, let me tell you, that was hell. I mean really, it was so hot out that it felt like hell. It isn’t supposed to be this hot out in March. I want it to be nice and cold, I guess I will be left with something to be desired, but that really doesn’t matter all that much to me. The kids I had didn’t help all that much either, they were just dumb, like not dumb, but I don’t think that they really wanted to be their, you know? I guess it was the first tim one of them had really tried doing anything remotly athletic, and I’m happy that he got to learn how to ski, but still, it’s just a pain in the but to have to go and sit on the magic carpet with these kids that can’t even stand up on their own and they are like 8 years old. It’s just messed up, I tell you. After work, I went down to the Manchester mall with some friends of mine. It was a good time, although, I wasn’t to fond of some of the girly stores that I got dragged into. I don’t like to sit there and wait for them to try on dresses and crap. After that,  we went out to dinner at Applebees, nice time, good food. Then we went home and played a board game. All in all it was actaully a half way decent time. I’m not going to complain about it.

I guess that’s what has happened in the last two days of my life. I don’t think it’s all the exciting, but maybe you do. I don’t really have any thoughts to share with you either. My mind is kind of lost at the moment. But that’s a good thing I guess. I hope that when you read this you got to go on a little escape for a moment. Life is to short to stress about all the time.

Till I write again, adiue.

Ello my friends, how are you doing? I trust that you are having a good day? It’s rainy and grey out today, I was planning on going skiing, but I don’t really want to go out there and get caught in the nasty weather. I wish that it would pick what season it wants to be and stay there. One day it’s like winter, the next it’s like spring. I guess that’s how March is, but that doesn’t mean that I have to like it, now does it? I had Civil Air Patrol last night, it was lots of fun. Everything seems to be running really smoothly now, and that’s good, means less work for me. We had a bunch of cadets pass their tests last night, about 8. Three new Currys, a Wright Brothers, and a Mitchel. That’s really cool, now I have an CDC that’s a C/2lt and a Flight Commander that’s a C/2lt, I’m loving it. For the longest time we had been in a spot with a bunch of NCO’s and Airmen with no officers. But I guess the circle is comming around. I found out that I only have to take the leadership tests for the next 2 or 3 achivements, that really made me happy. Don’t get me wrong, I love the aerospace stuff, but just doing one test every two months is nice. One of my Sgts might be going off to some Military School down in North Carolina, I think it would be a great thing for him he’ll find out what that life he thinks he wants is really like, but I hate to see him go. He’s a really awesome kid. I have youth group tonight, I’m taking my friend Sammi with me… (:
Well I really don’t have all that much else to tell you. I guess my mind is lost at the moment. Good bye for now…